Advent ABC's: Bondage

"For you did not receive the spirit of bondage again to fear, but you received the Spirit of adoption by whom we cry out, 'Abba, Father.'" (Rom. 8:15).

It’s a lot easier to write when I don’t envision my friends’ smirking faces as they read what I’ve written. In particular, I can see Heidi’s grin as she scans over these words. I see her face because it’s her voice I hear in my head right now. I’ve been playing back a conversation we had on Friday as we ate ice cream and sucked down several cups of coffee. “What are you so afraid of?” she asked me.

I had no answer then. I don’t have one now. What I do have is a heavy weight sitting right on my chest, squashing me, squeezing all the air out. Fear is that weight, but I don’t know what it is fear of exactly. Failure. Rejection. Pointlessness. All of the above. None of the above.

Fear is not a new companion. I have lived most of my life afraid of something. I remember the physical frozenness when I was in hospital chaplaincy training and how hard it was to make myself walk through that door. I have been so afraid of driving in weather. Fear has affected my friendships, my relationship with my husband, my job performance.

So when I started researching for today’s word, I started by doing a keyword search on bound. Nothing jumped. I switched to bind. Nope. I googled “spiritual bondage.” Getting closer. Then I pulled out my Theological Dictionary and was directed to the above scripture reference. It wasn’t until I read it a few times that one word jumped up and bit me on the nose. Again.

Chapter 7 of Romans is one of the Bible’s great wrestling matches. My other favorite is Jacob and the Angel. Anyway, in Romans 7, Paul is describing the internal wrestling match he has between doing the good he wants to do and the not-good that he ends up doing. Near the end of the match, Paul asks the question, “What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death?” The answer is Romans 8:1: Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death. Paul wants us to know that God has not set us free to be put into slavery, or bondage AGAIN.

In Christ Jesus we are not just set free, but we are adopted into the closest of relationships. To call God Abba is to refer to him in a dependent and loving way as would a child and with the respect that an adult has for his or her parent. It is a relationship that is completely secure and that’s what releases us from the bondage of fear.

As we wade even deeper into Advent, let us marvel at the freedom that Jesus came to offer. Let’s take time to identify and surrender our fears to him. I mean seriously, aren’t you getting tired of the wrestling match?
1. Come, thou long expected Jesus,
born to set thy people free;
from our fears and sins release us,
let us find our rest in thee.
Israel's strength and consolation,
hope of all the earth thou art;
dear desire of every nation,
joy of every longing heart.

2. Born thy people to deliver,
born a child and yet a King,
born to reign in us forever,
now thy gracious kingdom bring.
By thine own eternal spirit
rule in all our hearts alone;
by thine all sufficient merit,
raise us to thy glorious throne.

http://www.hymnsite.com/lyrics/umh196.sht

Advent ABC's: Abiding

When I first thought about writing on today’s topic, I thought that I was going to write about really living into a place. This is our first holidays in our new home and the whole idea of decorating and entertaining is something I’m looking forward to. Oddly, the biblical image that came to mind was a negative one. I thought of the Prodigal Son’s older brother. He was pretty miffed when Father threw the party for the useless piece of related DNA. He went into the whole: I never left home. I’ve been loyal and you never even gave me a goat to party with my buds. He was home the whole time, but never really there.

But that’s not what I want to write about. I was thinking about abiding and I went to John’s gospel to Jesus’ words in chapter 15. I have always thought of this as the “abiding” passage, in the same way that 1 Corinthians is the love chapter, and Psalm 23 is the Shepherd Psalm. I ended up pulling out my Greek New Testament, and my Lexicons. And I found something I never noticed before.

Chapter 15 contains multiple references to abiding or remaining. We are to remain in the vine. We are to abide in his love. We are to allow his words to abide in us. The word “meno” is used throughout the New Testament and means to dwell, lodge, rest settle, endure, continue unchanged, to persevere, to be constant, to be in close and settled union. In John 15:16 Jesus uses it to refer to producing fruit that will last, that will be permanent.

Our hot water heater went out on Thanksgiving. Thankfully, it was at the end of the day after almost all the dishes had been washed and daughter was able to do all the laundry she had brought with her to dinner. Things like that happen. What made this particularly frustrating is that the hot water heater had been replaced right before we moved in here in June of this year—6 months ago. There not supposed to break down that fast. When I was sharing this event, someone was quick to remind me that fewer and fewer things are made to last these days. We live in a disposable age where the economy depends on consumers buying new instead of trying to repair.

I was also thinking about this when I sat down the other night with my grandkids to watch a Christmas program on TV. There were so many commercials geared to stir up a greedy spirit in them. Buy this new toy. Get this new upgrade. Your life won’t be complete without this gadget. I looked at my grandkids and saw their wide-eyed innocent lives being grabbed. They didn’t know what I knew, that sure it looked good, but the fascination would wane and the toy would most likely break before the day was out. It just wouldn’t last.

That may be the sad truth in the consumer world, but in the spiritual realm we need something different. We need to be about producing fruit that will last. As you move into this Advent season will you ask God to show you how to connect your life to things will last?

Z: Zarepheth

(We have arrived at the end of November's ABC's. Today's Z: Zarephath is now posted. Since Advent begins tomorrow, I will be starting a daily Advent Series called "Don't Rush Me.")

Eventually the brook dried up because of the drought. Then God spoke to him: "Get up and go to Zarephath in Sidon and live there. I've instructed a woman who lives there, a widow, to feed you." 1 Kings 17:1

The “you” of the story is the prophet Elijah. Elijah has learned to listen to the voice of God and was quick to obey. But this instruction would really test his commitment. First, to go to Sidon was to truly head into enemy territory. That alone would make it a difficult assignment. The “where” he was to go paled in difficulty compared to the instruction that he was to entrust his needs to a widow. There were very strict guidelines on the care of widows and taking advantage of them was strictly forbidden. It would be hard to see God’s instruction as anything but taking advantage.

Interestingly, Zarephath means “place of refining.” Scripture seems to be full of instances where God asked what appeared to be impossible of those who were following him. Think of Abraham asked to leave home and everything familiar. He finally gets what seems to be the answer to God’s promise and the next thing he knows, God is requiring that he sacrifice his son, his only son, Isaac. Moses, a wanted killer, is required to go back to the scene of the crime. Gideon weeds out his army down to 300 and God expects him to take on an army that was more numerous than the sand on the shore. All were places and experiences of refining.

I don’t know about you, but I sometimes feel like God leaves me in Zarephath for way to long. Even in his instruction to Elijah, God gives a clue that this in not going to be an overnight experience. Elijah is told that he will live there. It reminds me of God’s instruction the Hebrews in captivity. In Jeremiah 29:3, God sends the message that they were to build homes and plan to stay. Later in that chapter he tells them that they will be in Babylon for seventy years. That’s some serious refining.

Refining, like pruning, can be a painful process. It is the end result that makes the process worthwhile. Will you trust God’s process in your life? What is he refining to make purely amazing in you?

Y: Yield

Be generous: Invest in acts of charity. Charity yields high returns. Ecc. 11:1, The Message

17 But the wisdom from above is first of all pure. It is also peace loving, gentle at all times, and willing to yield to others. It is full of mercy and good deeds. It shows no favoritism and is always sincere. James 3:17, NLT

One of the most useless roads signs these days, besides a Speed Limit sign in Texas, is the Yield sign. We don’t yield well. Today is “Black Friday” and as I’m writing it is 6:27AM. My husband has already left the house to join the throngs of die-hard shoppers looking for the elusive perfect buy. Wasn’t it just last year when someone was killed in a frantic stampede to get into Wal Mart?

Here’s your challenge for today: yield. Defer to someone else’s preference. Give up your place in line. Let someone else have the last piece of pecan pie. Loving actions yield high returns. The impact for the Kingdom could last forever.

Pausing For Thanks Giving

The daily note for Y is all ready, but I'm going to save it for tomorrow. One reason is that it really seems to fit better and for another, I just want to reflect on my blessings today.

Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it. ~William Arthur Ward

This is the quote I put on the board at Curves the other day. It reminded me a practice that Nelson and I have developed over the years. One of us will say something about how we were touched or impressed by someone, or how much we appreciate them, or something like that. Then the receiver of that info will look at the other and ask: so did you tell them that? This will typically result in a card, letter, email, or phone call. Take the gratitude directly to the place it needs to go.

Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow. ~Melody Beattie

I was looking for the first quote when I found this one this morning and I really like it. I read lots of Thanksgiving and gratitude quotes this week and I have to put this one at the top of the list. I went through a few moments of venting frustration yesterday. I felt unappreciated and taken advantage of. After I let off some of the steam I was able to see how easy it was to get sidetracked and slip down the hill into self-pity. As soon as I shifted my vision back onto what I had and how thankful I am for it, I felt myself becoming clear and at peace. Things may not be the way I want them, but I have so much. There's no sense in whining and pining for what I don't have. What I have is more blessing than I deserve.

Not what we say about our blessings, but how we use them, is the true measure of our thanksgiving. ~W.T. Purkiser

The irony of me using a quote by Purkiser today will be missed by most, but that's okay. The quote is good and a great springboard for me to move not just through this day but into all my tomorrows. What will you do with your blessings today?

X: xwpew

Today’s letter is X. I know that some of you wondered what I was going to do at this point. I did too. There are not many words that start with x and even fewer in the Bible. I could always write on Xerxes, but I’m thinking, no.

So I pulled out my Analytical Greek Lexicon and began looking at x words there. There were many to choose from. I thought about rejoice and grace—both seemed appropriate for the day and season. Then I read a little further in the list and came upon xwpew. It is used ten times in the New Testament and it has something to do with come, or make room. Now there’s a word for the eve of Thanksgiving.

How much room have you made for people to come? Nelson invited his folks for dinner. I’m excited to have them come to our new home. He also invited a guy from work who was going to have to be home alone. Our older daughter who lives in Indiana called to ask if a friend of hers who may not have a place to go could come with her and Penelope. Asher will be with us and Beth when she gets off work. We have two dining room tables, a card table, and a fold away table we can use. And there are actually eight dining room chairs, four metal folding chairs, and at least four desk chairs we could pull to the table. There is physical space to spare!

But how much room is there in our hearts and lives for people? How welcoming is our spirit? It’s often easier to set another place than to give them a place in your heart.

As I was thinking about this and trying to formulate these thoughts a black ball of purring fur jumped into my lap and climbed into my face. Last night two cats found our front porch. They had obviously been raised around people. One was larger, black with white front mittens and white socks on his back legs. He seemed to be protecting the little black and gray tiger kitten. The tiger is one big cuddle bug who never seems to stop purring. He has been dubbed Purrkins. I actually went to the internet to research famous White Sox players to find a name for the other and he is now responding to the name Jackson (as in Shoeless Joe). Jackson took a little longer to warm up. We put them out for the night, but they were right at the door wanting in this morning. Right now, after a good pet and cuddle session, Jackson is sleeping at my feet while Purrkins is curled up in Nelson’s desk chair.

I have a feeling I’m going to learn many lessons through these two. I don’t think it’s a mistake that they ended up on my front porch. More than deciding whether I wanted to “mess” with a couple cats, I had to first decide whether I was going to let them into my heart—and into my pocket. Life is full of choices like that. People end up on our “front porches” everyday. Will we let them in? Will we find room? Our God is all about bringing people in and making room. How about you?

W: Wonder

Today’s word is wonder. I sat here yesterday and watched videos about wonder. I walked around my house and sang “O, the wonder of it all.” I thought about it a lot today. When did we lose the wonder?

I remember standing at the Grand Canyon, speechless, trying to absorb the magnitude and the beauty. I held my grandson seconds after he was born. I have experienced a depth of love and forgiveness from people who could have leveled heavy justice and judgment. O, the wonder of it all.

How’s your wonder when it comes to the Christmas story? The miracles of Christmas? Can you still come to the manger with the wide-eyed wonder of a child? O, the wonder of it all.

V: Vulnerable

I'm not a huge fan of showing my vulnerable side. So I was pretty happy when I seemed to get the sense from my pastor's sermon on Sunday that we were to be armed by the Spirit so that we wouldn't be vulnerable to his attacks. As the day went on, I felt a nudging by the Spirit. Perhaps you know the kind, where he lets know you've been thinking or looking at something in the wrong way. I was drawn back to a verse from our women's Bible study earlier in the week. We were at the place where Jesus was sending the disciples out on their first solo mission. According to Matthew's account, he tells them that he is sending them out as sheep among the wolves and that they are to wise as serpents and innocent as doves (see Matthew 10:5ff, especially verse 16).

What I saw in this is that being vulnerable is both and. We are to be very savvy when it comes to the attacks of the enemy. We need to be dressed fully in the protection of the Lord (see Ephesians 6:13-17). We need to take our thoughts captive or be a captive. We need to be ready to "beat feet" if need be so that we can get away.

On the other hand we are to be innocent as doves. That just seems to speak of our implicit vulnerability. We need to stay vulnerable to our brothers and sisters and to God. We need to be careful to not get so cocky in our armor that we lose touch with one another. We really do need each other. We are admonished by the writer of Hebrews that we are not to neglect meeting together and encouraging one another (Hebrews 10:25). One of the impetuses for the Wesleyan movement was John Wesley's awareness of our need for accountability.

We also need to stay vulnerable with God. That sounds so obvious, but if we were to take the time to honestly examine this area we might see how we have tended to shut God out of certain decisions, how we have attempted to maneuver through situations in our own strength, or how we have determined not to bother God with something that we deem trivial.

Two incidents immediately jump to mind as I reflect on how we struggle with the trivial, or small. Way back when I was in seminary for the first time, a classmate came to chapel and a begged us to join him in a specific prayer request. His wife had delivered their son prematurely. Things were improving for Matthew, but Jim asked us to pray that God would help Matthew drink one ounce and keep it down. The request revolutionized my prayer life. Never again would I see anything as too small for God. Fast forward to a current situation. The grown daughter of dear friends is battling with a constriction of her esophagus. She has been undergoing endoscopy procedures to stretch her esophagus. As I was praying for her I remembered little Matthew. God cared about his ability to drink one ounce--which he did, by the way! God, the God who created the universe also created microbes too small for the human eye to see unassisted. He cares about millimeters. Nothing is too small for him. Stay open and pliable, vulnerable to Him.

So are you vulnerable? I hope the answer is no and yes. I pray that you are increasing in awareness and discipline to protect yourself from the wiles of the evil one. I also pray that you keep a vulnerable, innocent and open, heart before God and your brothers and sisters in the Lord. It is when you are both that you find that you are fruitful and productive in the Lord (2 Peter 1:3-8).

U: Undivided

Teach me your way, O LORD, and I will walk in your truth; give me an undivided heart, that I may fear your name. Psalm 86:11, NIV

I will give them an undivided heart and put a new spirit in them; I will remove from them their heart of stone and give them a heart of flesh. Ezekiel 11:19, NIV

I am saying this for your own good, not to restrict you, but that you may live in a right way in undivided devotion to the Lord. 1Corinthians 7:35, NIV

I don’t know about you, but I used to wonder why we drilled so much on math. No wait, when I drilled it was called arithmetic. I just had to use my little phrase to even help me spell the word: a rat in the house might eat the ice cream. And now there is no such thing in studies as arithmetic. But I digress.

When I would groan about spending time on my multiplication tables or working out long division, be sure to show your work, my father would always tell me that I would need it someday. Well, at that moment someday looked a long way off when all I wanted to do was go out and play. So even when it came to math I had a divided heart.

We may not think about the Divided Heart Syndrome, but we live with it every day. Our case may not be as bad as Paul’s (read Roman’s 7 for his symptom description), but we know the way it impacts us: we feel torn between what we know we should, ought, or need to do and what we want to do. This may be as simple as needing to clean out the garage but wanting to sit in front of the TV soaking in every sporting event on a Sunday, or trying to ignore the laundry so that you can sit down with a good book. Those examples probably won’t get you into too much trouble unless your wife wants to park her car in that garage. Where we really get into trouble is when these mundane choices bleed their way into our spiritual life.

I spent a lot of years chasing after perfection in my faith. I thought that if I just read enough scripture, attended enough worship services or Bible studies, prayed hard enough, and devoted myself to service I might achieve it. I really took to heart what I thought Kierkegaard’s “purity of heart is to will one thing.” But the harder I tried the more I wrestled like Paul, the thing that I wanted to do I could not and the thing I didn’t want just seemed to keep on happening. I felt so divided I must have been Humpty Dumpty’s sister.

Slowly, it began to dawn on me that perhaps that to “will one thing” was not the same as to do one thing. I started to believe that the heart of flesh that God wanted to give me wouldn’t necessarily result in a perfection of actions or maybe even attitudes, but it would result in a cleansing of my desires. David writes in Psalm 37:4 that if we will delight ourselves in Him that he will give us our heart’s desires. I no longer see this as God donning a Santa suit and filling my grown up wish list, but that he will put in my heart the desire to desire things he desires. And then, I will find the will to will one thing.

So are you feeling a bit scattered? Oddly enough, ‘tis the season. How crazy is that? In the season when we should be the most focused, we find ourselves the most out of focus. When a spirit of Thanksgiving should waltz us right to the manger , we find ourselves quick stepping all over the place.

My prayer for all of us today is that we would be willing to stop the division and allow God to place in our hearts the desire to live by a unified spirit. He does an amazing job of bringing the pieces together if we’ll let Him.

T: Theme

My heart overflows with a good theme; I address my verses to the King; My tongue is the pen of a ready writer. Psalm 45:1 NASB

What is the theme of your life? Here are some definitions I found of the word theme to help you begin to think about the theme of your life:
-a unifying or dominating idea
-in music: a short melodic subject from which variations are developed.
-in linguistics: A word or phrase in a sentence, usually providing information from previous discourse or shared knowledge, that the rest of the sentence elaborates or comments on. Also called theme.


So when you look at the glass, is it half full, or half empty? Typically, I feel like my cup is overflowing. Even if I considered the glass to have “less” in it, I would find some way to see the light heartedness of the missing quantity, and be thankful for what I had. People ask me how I am and my answer is typically the same: I’m great. And even if I’m not, I am. It’s almost as if I don’t know how to be any other way. That level of optimism always seems to come out in the way I write, too. I may not always be perky. I get tired (more like weary) and discouraged sometimes, but I can’t stay there.

Do you know your themes? I did some reading about this on the internet. There’s quite a bit on there. One of the suggestions for discovering your themes is to think of two of your most favorite books. Once those are identified, look at the lead characters and consider the ways you most connect with them. If that doesn’t help, try using music or movies. Your themes will surface in the things you connect with or are drawn to.

Why would it be important to understand the themes in your life? I believe that when we can understand the things that motivate us and define us then we can operate more freely and fully. Whether we realize it or not our themes become filters for the decisions that we make. Wouldn’t it be better to know what those are and work with them instead of against them? And when we can understand the process in ourselves we will be better adept at understanding and working with the themes in our children, family, and co-workers.

Now, while some themes are just part of who we are, we can choose to add themes to our lives as well. I was thinking about this as I was contemplating the quickly arriving New Year and the dreaded process of making resolutions. What if instead of making a list of promised do’s and don’ts for 2010 we spent some of our quiet time allowing the Spirit to bring a theme to the surface that could serve as a guide for our decisions and relationships? Write it on a card, cross-stitch it, put it on your computer wallpaper, place it wherever you need to so that you will be reminded of that theme. Then when you have a tough decision to make you can be reminded, when relationships are stalled or strained, when you want to give up or give in, you will find renewed strength, hope, determination, or peace to get you through. It sure sounds like something that could stick with us beyond the first week of January.

Many years ago I tried this and my word was contentment. I wasn’t sure I liked all the implications, but I trusted when it came to me that I needed to heed it. It was a rough year that resulted in many personal sacrifices, but with each one I was able to come through with a deeper sense of peace and trusting . I’ve been praying for a theme for next year. I’m starting to see what it may be. I’m excited and challenged. Do you know your themes? What theme will guide you for the future?

S: Satisfied

I remember being asked, quite sarcastically when I was younger, “Are you satisfied now?” Typically the question came when I was being perceived as annoying and it often resulted in my mother crying or becoming enraged. Being satisfied, then, was never a good thing.

So it was pretty amazing when I was in seminary and studying the Beatitudes to come across this: 6"Blessed are (A)those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be satisfied. (Matt. 5:6, NASB). The word for satisfied is often translated filled, but it is a richer word than that. The root refers to an enclosure, or pasture-ground. The verb means to feed or fill with grass; to fatten; to satiate or gorge.

Now a couple things jump out at me immediately with this. First, when was the last time you were gorged? With Thanksgiving right around the corner it shouldn’t be too hard to come up with a time. We’re already full from a wonderful meal and yet somehow we find just enough room to squeeze in a few bites of dessert, with whipped cream, please. And pardon me while I loosen my belt. Hold onto that image and now answer me this: when was the last time you were that satiated spiritually? Are you hungering and thirsting for the things that will truly satisfy?

Then I was thinking about the root word, pasture-ground and enclosure. My mind drifted back to the image of the Good Shepherd who leads his flock to lie down in green pastures. He knows where to put us so that our spirits can be fed, and fed to the fullest. His promise is that if we will hunger after him, he will completely fill us. If you’re not feeling satisfied, full on God, it’s about you—not Him!

So, I’m wondering today: Are you satisfied now? It really is a good thing!

R: Ran

"But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him.”

This verse comes from the story of the Prodigal Son. After winding up in the pigpen, he “comes to his senses” and realizes that the servants back home had it way better than him. He figures out he has nothing to lose, so he heads home. All the way there he practices his speech. We’ve all done it, sometimes in the bathroom mirror, but we go over and over those words that are so hard to imagine saying. The coolest thing in the PS’s story is that he never gets to give the whole speech.

I have always loved this story, but it wasn’t until recently that I was captured by the father’s actions. He never gave up hope. He might have been related to the Motel 6 guy, because he always left the light on! But it was his actions when PS was finally coming home that most grab my heart. By all rights he could have stood at the gate with his arms crossed, tapping his toe, and waiting for PS to come groveling up the walk. But he didn’t! He ran across town and met PS there.

I think there are some specific reasons that Father went out to meet his son. If you’ve grown up in or around the church then you know how tongues can wag and how fast juicy gossip spreads. Father wasn’t going to let his son walk across town, facing down the verbal onslaught alone. They were all going to know just how proud he was of his son for coming home, for making the tough choice to swallow his pride, and besides, that way he could invite them to the party.

Can you see PS’s face? He’s been rehearsing his line all the way, giving emphasis to the different words. He’s tired, sweaty, and unsure of what’s going to happen when he gets home, but before he can get his words out, here comes Father. Oh no! Was he so angry that he couldn’t even wait for him to get home? What would he do now? Should he just turn and run? He had no time to think because before he knows it Father’s arms around his neck in warmest embrace!

A party is called for and immediately planned. Then, begins the arduous task of walking through town. PS can hardly believe the way Father has his arm around him. He had literally wished his father dead to get his share of the estate. Then he wastes it. He has nothing to show. Nothing to hold onto…except Father. At each house, all along the way, Father is proudly announcing PS’s return and inviting everyone to the party. Their tongues might wag, but they were going to know that Father was overjoyed at his son’s return.

There’s a gospel song that says:
the only time I ever saw Him run…
Was when He ran to me, He took me in His arms
Held my head to His chest, said “My son’s come home again”
Lifted my face, wiped the tears from my eyes
With forgiveness in His voice He said,
“Son do you know I still love you?”
He caught me by surprise when God ran .

Watch this and know this: Father loves you and runs to you, too! Let the party begin!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b1O4eS9jxfM

Q: Quiet

15For thus the Lord GOD, the Holy One of Israel, has said,
"In repentance and (AH)rest you will be saved,
In (AI)quietness and trust is your strength."
But you were not willing,


When our first grandchild, Penelope, was born I created an ABC lullaby that was quite effective at calming her and lulling her to sleep. She heard it nearly every day for six months and then she and her mommy moved away. My second grandchild, Caden didn’t get to hear the song much since they lived away from us when he was little. When Asher came along he lived with us and even when he and his mommy got an apartment he came to see us nearly every day. Needless to say, Asher heard the lullaby almost daily. As calming as it was for him, singing it also calmed my spirit.

I have come to appreciate quiet and not just the quiet that comes after the kids are gone. I mean the stillness of a fresh morning when I whisper even to God. This has not always been the case. For far too many years I had way too much on my on my plate. Keeping myself busy, taking on more and more tasks earned me recognition at work and seemed to impress people. So I kept at it, all the while feeling a niggling in my spirit that whispered of my need for quiet and rest. But I was not willing, and the result was tragic. I’m still trying to put the pieces back together, but some days it really doesn’t feel like there any pieces to work with (see Isaiah 30:14).

Recently Asher was obviously needing a nap, but desperately fighting to stay awake. He had crawled up into my lap so I started to sing the ABC lullaby. Knowing that he didn’t want to go to sleep, he put his hand over my mouth and said, “No, Mema.” He knew if I continued to sing he would fall asleep and he just couldn’t afford to miss anything. Or so he thought. He had a miserable afternoon which resulted in his spending some time in Time Out where, finally alone, he fell asleep.

Just like I knew that Asher needed a nap, God knows what we need. He knew what the children of Israel needed, too. They foolishly wanted to put their confidence back in Egypt. They didn’t want to trust in God or his word. The prophet is warning them that they needed to return and find their rest, their satisfaction in God and his plan. They needed to surrender their disquieted spirit and find their strength in him. But they weren’t willing. Are you?

P: Participate

Are you an observer or a participant? I know, it depends on what’s going on. My extroverted personality tends to get me involved. My lack of boundaries causes me to say yes to things I don’t always “want” to do. And because I’m somewhat ADD, well, I just don’t sit well. I like to be where things are happening. Unless the “happening” is in the kitchen or on a sports field of play. I do know my limitations.

Ah, limitations in participation. They are pretty much self-imposed, wouldn’t you agree? We have our list of “can’ts” that we are quick to recite when with really can’t or don’t want to do something. When I was a kid and my grandmother wanted to teach me to knit and crochet, I was quick to use the excuse that I was left handed and therefore couldn’t learn. I’m not exactly sure where I got that, unless it was from my first grade teach who I absolutely exasperated as she struggled to teach me how to write my letters. Perhaps she determined and announced that I was unteachable because I was left handed. Anyway, it was an excuse that served me well on summer days when I was clearly more interested in playing outdoors than learning to knit one and purl two.

All this thinking about participation, reminded me of one of my favorite passages in scripture. It was penned by Peter: 3His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness. 4Through these he has given us his very great and precious promises, so that through them you may participate in the divine nature and escape the corruption in the world caused by evil desires. (2 Peter 1:3-4, NIV)

I found this passage early on in my faith journey, thanks to a small book by Bob Benson entitled, “Come Share the Being.” You can borrow my copy, but I want it back. In it he invites to really contemplate that we have not only been invited, but we are equipped to share in the divine nature of God. You and me, with all our stuff—good and bad—have been given his great and precious promises so that we can participate in the divine nature of God. Does that give you chill bumps, or knock you upside the head, or break your heart? Think about it!

Now, given that we’ve been given ev-er-ee-thing (hear that word broken down and pronounced in a slow exaggerated manner) that we need, how (how, how, how) can we continue to throw up excuses and can’ts when God asks us to do something? It is so time to stop letting a few do the work while we observe. It is time to participate. If you’re ready to plunge right in, by all means go ahead! The water’s great! But if not, if you’re feeling a little more timid, if you need a little more confirmation (if your cousin’s name is Gideon), than stick your toe in and watch what he will do. When the Hebrew children were willing to put their toes in the Red Sea or the Jordan River they parted. You have been given everything, his precious promises, to be able to participate in his divine nature. And yes, that does mean you—no matter what your first grade teacher, or mom, or boyfriend, or boss have said!

I don’t what time the clock says as you’re reading this, but I know it’s time to stop observing and start participating. What are you waiting for? You have everything you need.

O: Open

Asher has always been the center of attention. When he was a toddler he would engage us in endless games of Follow the Leader. His latest effort to gain our attention is to announce that it’s time for Talent Show in the living room. His talent might be creating music on the piano or juggling with one ball. Last week’s offering had us all in stitches: he was performing magic.

“Watch while I make this car ‘jus-da-peer’ (meaning disappear).” Our eyes were riveted. “Watch me. Now, close your eyes.” At this point we were all required to close or cover our eyes. Once he achieved the expected compliance, and none of us were peeking, he would put the car in his pocket, under his shirt, or hide it under the footstool. Then he would announce the ‘jusdapeerance’ with a proud “Tada!” to which we gleefully responded with amazement and ovations.

“Watch me. Close your eyes.” The phrase stuck with me and I decided to meditate on it to see what God might want to teach me. A couple thoughts bubbled to the surface. First, how like us that is. We start our faith journey with eyes wide open. Then we get scared and our trust flies out the window as we shut our eyes tight. When we do that we can’t see how God is working and when we don’t see it we begin to wonder if he is working. If we would only open our eyes we might see so much of his handiwork.

As I thought longer, though, I began to see that “Watch me, close your eyes” might be exactly what God wants us to do. We walk by faith not sight—or we’re supposed to. His desire is that we would open the eyes of our heart (see Paul’s prayer in Ephesians 1:188ff). Thomas is told, “Blessed are those who have not seen and yet believe.” After all, what is the definition of faith? According to Hebrews: 1Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see (11:1, NIV).

Two songs have been welling up from within my heart today. First, is the chorus, “Open the eyes of my heart Lord…I want to see you.” And, “Amazing grace, how sweet the sound…I once was blind, but now I see.”

So I’m wondering how your vision is today? Are your spiritual eyes open? He has so much to show you and he won’t ‘jusdapeer.’

N: Nevertheless

Have you ever hunted for a verse you were just sure existed? I spent the morning trying to find a verse that I was sure used the word “nevertheless” since today’s letter is N. In my mind, I remember a woman retelling the story of the three Hebrew men, Shad, Mesch, and Ben and their conversation just before being thrown into the fiery furnace. I remember her describing them and how they told Neb that they knew God could save them, but even if he didn’t “nevertheless” they would trust him. The word is just not there---but the essence is!

So I still want to consider “nevertheless faith.” It’s the kind of faith that holds strong when everything else gives way, especially when you have asked, nay pleaded, with God to make things go a different way. It’s the kind of faith that makes no sense to anyone else, especially not to unbelievers. It is childlike, but not naïve. It is trusting, but not foolish. Here’s how the hymn writer saw it:
1. Oh, for a faith that will not shrink
Tho' pressed by many a foe;
That will not tremble on the brink
Of poverty or woe;

2. That will not murmur nor complain
Beneath the chast'ning rod,
But in the hour of grief or pain
Can lean upon its God;

3. A faith that shines more bright and clear
When tempests rage without;
That, when in danger, knows no fear,
In darkness feels no doubt;

4. That bears unmoved the world's dread frown
Nor heeds its scornful smile;
That sin's wild ocean cannot drown
Nor Satan's arts beguile;

5. A faith that keeps the narrow way
Till life's last spark is fled
And with a pure and heavenly ray
Lights up the dying bed.

6. Lord give us such a faith as this;
And then, whate'er may come,
We'll taste e'en now the hallowed bliss
Of an eternal home.

M: MVNC, Michigan, Misfits, and Maturity

One of the greatest enemies to my relationships is thinking I’m not worthy or I don’t belong. I have spent my life battling with “I-don’t-belong-syndrome.” So, the irony that M should land on this day is not lost on me. Today has had plans in it for a very long time, plans that God made that superseded anything that could have been done by me. Today is the 30th class reunion of my college graduating class. I was excited to go and see people and reminisce at my Alma Mater. Trouble was I didn’t write the dates on my calendar. I read material from the Alumni Association, but the dates never penetrated my brain. In the meantime, a friend from high school came up with a wonderful idea to travel to Michigan to see another one of our high school friends. When the miracle happened that we all had a Saturday off together I rejoiced and marked that date on my calendar. A final piece of material came from MVNC that was meant to remind me of the reunion and it hit me that I had made the mistake of not marking my calendar. Now what a mess that was! Or was it? Today seems to be a day to deal with my own demons of feeling like a misfit and wanting instant maturity.

Feeling like a misfit goes way back into my childhood. I recognized it most at Christmas each time when I watched the Rudolph Christmas special. I would sit and listen to the misfit toys sing their woeful song and then get all excited when in spite of their differentness they were able to find joy and love when they were reunited with the other toys. Even the “Bumble” found usefulness and meaning. As I grew I seemed to always find ways to lock into the group where I never felt like I fit in: I was never quite smart, talented, pretty, rich, or loveable enough. Those were terrible monsters to battle and I know that those feelings are a part of teenage angst and from a developmental psychology perspective I was struggling to find my identity. Throughout the process I felt like David in Saul’s armor: nothing seemed to fit. But unlike David, I didn’t know how to throw it off and find myself.

The other component that made life that so difficult for me was that I wanted instant maturity. I remember standing on the stage at the end of the Miss Teenage Columbus Pageant. I had actually made the top five. I was now going to have to answer a question that would determine my place among the winners. I was given a list of characteristics and told to chose the two I felt were most important and why. I distinctly remember that one of my answers was wisdom and I think the other was happiness. I wanted wisdom because I knew it was knowledge well used. At seventeen I wanted to have all the answers and the ability to function wisely. Now perhaps that seems like a good thing, but in my answer I see my propensity to want to short-circuit the process. It wasn’t until I was in my thirties that someone finally helped me realize the importance of process, the need to value the process not just to strive for the end result. So now in my fifties, I feel like a kid just sucking the life out of the process and it feels weird and people look at me even weirder.

As I was thinking about all of this I was prompted to pick up my copy of Warren’s “The Purpose Driven Life.” I was required to read this at work several years ago and while I found pieces of it interesting, I was at such a different place spiritually than my co-workers that it wasn’t a good experience for me. I chaffed against it to be quite honest. So this morning I was flipping through some of the pages and I found a section on the misfits of God—imagine that! Here’s what Warren writes:

“What matters is not the duration of your life, but the donation of it. Not how long you lived, but how you lived. If you’re not involved in any service or ministry, what excuse have you been using? Abraham was old, Jacob was insecure, Leah was unattractive, Joseph was abused, Moses stuttered, Gideon was poor, Samson was codependent, Rahab was immoral, David had an affair and all kinds of family problems, Elijah was suicidal, Jeremiah was depressed, Jonah was reluctant, Naomi was a widow, John the Baptist was eccentric to say the least, Peter was impulsive and hot-tempered, Martha worried a lot, the Samaritan woman had several failed marriages, Zaccheaus was unpopular, Thomas had doubts, Paul had poor health, and Timothy was timid. That is quite a variety of misfits, but God used each of them in his service. He will use you, too, if you stop making excuses.” (p. 233)

Speaking of maturity, Warren then refers to the process of maturing fruit and vegetables. He writes: “When you try to ripen fruit quickly, it loses it flavor. In America, tomatoes are usually picked unripened so they won’t bruise during shipping to the stores. Then, before they are sold, these green tomatoes are sprayed with CO2 gas to turn them red instantly. Gassed tomatoes are edible, but they are no match to the flavor of a vine-ripened tomato that is allowed to mature slowly.” (p. 217)

So what does this all have to do with going to Michigan instead of MVNC? I’m glad you’re still with me to ask the question. Today I’m spending the day with the woman who was class president and so popular I didn’t realize she even knew my name. She has a life that I used to dream would be mine. And today by the grace of God I call her my friend. And we’re going to visit the woman who won that Miss Teenage Columbus Pageant when I was fourth runner up. She is one of the smartest, most gifted women I know and God has blessed my life with her friendship as well. Today I’m marveling in a process that has taken way more than 30 years to effect. Three of us will enjoy the day together, but there are multitudes who have made it possible for me to do so. I can’t name you by name here, but know that you will be in my heart there. Today there is no misfit. Talk about maturity.

L: Learn

I have thought about today’s L word. I considered lukewarm and thought a lot about long-suffering, but kept coming back to the word learn. Seems like an appropriate word to follow yesterday’s word, knowledge.

I want to be a learner. Have you ever considered what it takes to really be a learner? There are so many different theories. School s have formed based on those styles and theories. I’ve recently been watching learning on a daily basis. Asher seems to learn something new every day. Yesterday he wrote his name for the very first time. He wrote it on the back of a friend’s grocery list. She had to recopy the list because that paper was definitely going home with me for his baby book! Letters are becoming words. Soon words will be read in sentences. It’s amazing.

One of my “favorite” passages of scripture is Matthew 10:28-30. Jesus’ compassionate invitation to the weary crowd was to come to him and learn from him. He was their teacher. He is ours, too.

And now I’m going to learn from Jesus and go sleep because I’m tired.

K: Knowledge

In his second letter, Peter begins by saying: Grace and peace be yours in abundance through the knowledge of God and of Jesus Christ our Lord. And he ends with: But grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. In between the two, knowledge comes up several more times. What point do you think Peter is trying to make?

Recently in a bible study I’m doing by Beth Moore, she writes about the disconnect that sometimes, often, happens between brain (what we know) and heart (what we feel). I understand this and struggle with it more often than I care to admit. I think Peter knew it, too. Think about Peter: he knew there was something about Jesus when he was drug to him by his brother Andrew; he makes the strong confession of who Jesus is; he knows Jesus has incredible power and can make him walk on the water, too; and he witnesses the amazing vision on the Mount of Transfiguration. Peter even declares that there’s nowhere else to go but to Jesus. Then Jesus is arrested. Peter panics and throws everything he knows right out the window. He draws his sword. He vehemently denies Jesus. He cowers behind a locked door with the other confused disciples. Finally, he goes back to fishing. Why? Because it’s what he knows most surely and he feels like his heart has betrayed him.

I am so glad that Jesus chose to work with Peter, to call Peter his friend, and come back and restore him after he messed up. I love the scene of Peter’s restoration on the shore after Jesus’ resurrection. I believe that something was sealed in Peter’s heart and mind in that encounter. Peter realized in a new way that he thought he knew Jesus, but that it was just the beginning! Peter was being invited to new depths of knowledge—and so are we!

Think about it: we are to grow in grace and knowledge. This is intentional. I have been married to an amazing man for over 30 years. I continue to learn from him and about him and he about me. I imagine in the next 30 years there will still be things to learn! What I know about him and from him has helped us weather some of life’s toughest storms and tests. I honestly don’t think we could have withstood some of them if they had come early on in our relationship. Like Peter and the other disciples, it might have just been easier to go back to what we knew before. What I am saying is that it took work and intentionality to build our relationship and get us to where we are today and where we will be
tomorrow. And our relationship with God deserves no less attention or intention.

So I’m wondering today, do you know Him better today than you did yesterday, than last week? What are you doing to grow your relationship with Him? The good news is that whatever you will commit to that process he will bless and multiply. He wants to be known! He wants you to be so solid in what you know about Him that when the tough times come, and your feelings are frayed and giving way to the storm, you will have something clear and sure to hold onto!

J: Joy

The word I originally wrote down for today is joy. I tried all day yesterday to find a different ‘j’ word. Part of the reason I struggled was related to the verse that automatically comes to my mind when I think of joy is James 1:2. I learned that verse: count it all joy, my brothers, when you face all kinds of trials. Now that may not be any “version” exactly, but that’s because I was raised on RSV, grabbed LB as a new believer, used the NIV as a pastor for over 20 years, came to like the NRSV, and have spent the last ten years using the NLT. Sprinkle in there a liberal dabbling with The Message and you see why I’m not much of a memorizer.

What I realized as I read and studied the verse is that I was putting a period in the middle of the sentence. By putting a period in the middle I was reading that I was supposed to be joy-full when I was being tried, as if going through difficult was a good thing. Well, in a way it is, but God is not about difficulty and trials for difficulty and trials sake. God doesn’t not look down on his people and play a let’s make them miserable game. There’s a point and that’s the part we miss if we stop, put the period, too soon.

Read the whole thought: 2 Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3 because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. 4 Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. (Today’s New International Version) It appears that James wants to understand that the point or purpose to trials is to mature us and complete us so that we will not lack anything. And we shouldn’t try to short circuit the trial, because then we will come away without the thing that God wants us to have.

We have a God who can work things out for good. I’m not much of a cook, and that’s probably overstating it. Over the years we’ve had to learn how to take the results of my efforts and turn it into something edible. Most recently, I was trying to make cornbread for a soup supper at church. Nelson had made some wonderful chili and my job was to take the batter (which he had already prepared) and bake them. I sprayed the pans, but the muffins refused to come out. I had a bowl full of cornbread crumbles. We took them to the meal and I was quite apologetic. Everybody loved them. They went perfectly right into the chili: no muss, no fuss.

Going through a difficult time? Facing the trial of your life? Have you considered how much God loves and trusts you, and wants you to be mature and complete? Don’t circumvent his plan. He has you right where he wants you. He wants to give you everything that you need.

Quite often people quote Jeremiah 29:11 to their friends who are facing unbelievable trials, or they grab onto it to bolster their own faith. It truly is a powerful verse. But I would challenge you to go put it in context of at least the whole chapter. Keep in mind these folks were captives in exile and God told them to settle in, build homes, and trust him because he really did have a plan and purpose in all this. It wasn’t going to be easy, but they were to hang on because he would bring them home. Maybe not the way they wanted, but they would come home.

When Jesus was talking to his disciples at the end of his life, he was aware that things were going to get tough for them. Some would lose their lives because of their faith. John records that final time together and in the chapter on abiding and pruning, there are these words: I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete (John 15:11). There’s that same trio: joy, trial, and completeness.

So keep the period where it belongs, at the end of the thought. Hold on, and rejoice that he considers you worthy of completion.

I: I AM

I am not big on “why?” questions. I choose to live my life in the “is” zone. Other people spend enormous amounts of energy and angst asking why something did or didn’t happen. I accept things as is and move on. The positive to that is that I don’t tend to get stuck. The down side is that I sometimes appear shallow and naïve.

Here’s a why question for you: why do we have to dissect everything? Why do we have to take things apart and find out what makes them tick? The clock works, leave it alone. Okay, maybe that’s a really bad analogy, and I really do understand that we need to understand how things work so we can fix them and improve them. I’m just not one of the people that God invested that inquisitive mind in. Picture me at the burning bush instead of Moses. I wouldn’t have had near the number of excuses and when God told me what to tell them was his name, I would have agreed and headed to Pharaoh.

Do you remember the scene? You can find it in Exodus 3 and 4. Moses sees a bush on fire, but not being consumed and the text seems to insinuate that he sort of meanders over to check it out. It’s not until the Bush starts giving Moses instructions that he starts balking. He has excuses and needs reassurance, a name and a sign. In the end he even suggests that God has the wrong guy. Surely, he wanted to be talking to his brother…or anybody other than himself.

The name that God gave Moses has been the focus of countless language scholars and theologians. It’s almost as if by understanding the name, we could understand God. I think it’s interesting that God told Moses that his name was “I Am” and the rest of the scriptures seems to be about explaining what that means. There are seven references by Jesus in the New Testament, I am: bread of life, good shepherd, light of the world, living water, way truth and life, the resurrection and the life, and finally claiming to be before Abraham (before Abraham, I AM). Trouble seems to be that even with all the explanation, we still don’t get it.

One of my favorite quotes has been attributed to Kierkegaard, Niebuhr, Osho, Henry Miller, and Joseph Campbell: life is a mystery to be lived, not a problem to be solved. And in that same vein, I believe that: God is a mystery to be loved, not an entity to be dissected. Karl Barth, the highly respected Swiss theologian, who wrote countless theological volumes, when asked to sum up his life work into one sentence replied: Jesus loves me this I know, for the Bible tells me so. That’s pretty clear. Understandable enough for a child. Clear enough for a hurting world. Just tell them I AM.

So before you race out the door and into your day, will you take a moment to reflect on how you will live so that they will know he is?

H: Heaven

On the most recent Koinonia Weekend, five of the twenty-four participants were hearing imapaired. The whole weekend was full of special moments as our community welcomed them in. The learning was rich and I can’t help but believe that it made God smile.

One moment touched my heart and kicked me in the butt at the same time. Our table communities were returning from our small group chapel Saturday night. As the groups return there is singing and conversation. It’s a lighter time after what can often be emotionally laden chapels. Shortly after my table returned to the meeting room, the guy playing his guitar started playing the old hymn “What A Day That Will Be.” As he was playing one of the hearing impaired participants started sing along. The usually noisy room hushed immediately and gave their full attention to singer and song. There were no dry eyes to be found. It was beautiful.

It was in that moment when it felt like my heart and my butt were attached and I got a pretty quick kick. I don’t know about you, but I don’t spend much time wishing for heaven. Unlike the singer that night, my song about heaven is more like the old Imperials song, “If Heaven Never Was Promised to Me.” The chorus goes: But if heaven never was promised to me, neither God’s promise to live eternally, it’s been worth just having the Lord in my life. Living in a world of darkness, he brought me the light.”

I used to think that heaven was the invention of people too weak to handle life as it came to them. There had to be something better than this, so they would long for the “Sweet By and By.” Eventually their preoccupation resulted in the adage that “they were so heavenly minded that they were of no earthly use.” As frustrating or disappointing as my life got, I loved it. I felt fortunate, blessed, and loved. There was a contentment that rolled over into complacency. Life was okay, what did I need heaven for?

I was thinking about that when I came across Paul’s word’s to the Colossians: 1 Since you have been raised to new life with Christ, set your sights on the realities of heaven, where Christ sits in the place of honor at God’s right hand. 2 Think about the things of heaven, not the things of earth. 3 For you died to this life, and your real life is hidden with Christ in God. (Colossians 3:1-3, NLT)

Paul is pretty clear. Heaven is to fill our thoughts so that we are not to get stuck thinking about here only. It really sounds like we need balance. We need to keep in mind that our real life is hidden with Christ. Life doesn’t end here. It’s not even really about here. Here we are to love, learn, lead, and look. To get too comfortable here is to take our eyes off the real prize.

So Woody, sing the chorus again, please. I’m ready to add my harmony: what a day, glorious day, that will be.

G: Gift

A group of us were discussing how grace is like a gift. One of the group noted that they really couldn't understand how anyone could turn down a gift. Another said they didn't think people refused gifts. I had to unfortunately disagree.

The first example that came to mind was my grandson. While he was yet a toddler, my husband began the daily habit of giving him a Matchbox car. Asher loved this. It was like a game to him. As time progressed, Nelson tried to introduce other gifts into the mix and they were met with a fit of tears and protests. Now, we may not stomp our feet when we don't receive what we want or expect from God, but take inventory for a moment. Have you ever had your own spiritual tantrum or pouting party when God didn't come through like you wanted?

The other thing I've noticed is from adults. This probably stands out more to me because I have in recent years been more on the receiving end of people's generosity. I have witnessed folks trying to help others and those would be recipients turning down the gift when it wasn't exactly what they wanted/needed. They were offered a couch or bed and the gift was declined because it wasn't the right size, style, or color.

Perhaps I'm thinking more about gifts because we're heading into the gifting season or because the next two major holidays focus on thankfulness and God's great gift to us. Perhaps, but really, it's just that I'm seeing every day as a gift. I have truly taken to heart the words of Jeremiah in Lamentations 3: The steadfast love the Lord never ceases, his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness (vs. 22-23)

I'm not foolish or naive enough to believe that everything that comes my way is good. But like Paul in his words to the Roman church so long ago: he (God) works everything for good. The best news in that is that I don't have to see that right now. I just have to know it and trust it. He really is the giver of all good gifts.

F: Fussing

Okay, will all the fussers in the room, please raise your hand? That is if you can get a hand free to raise it. Hi, I’m Tina. I fuss. And in case you want to tell me that you never fuss, here’s the definition:
fuss
1. Needlessly nervous or useless activity; commotion: There was a lot of fuss on moving day.
2.
a. A state of excessive and unwarranted concern over an unimportant matter: made a big fuss over one low test grade.
b. An objection; a protest: The longer working hours caused a big fuss.
3. A quarrel.
4. A display of affectionate excitement and attention: Everyone made a fuss over the new baby.
v. fussed, fuss•ing, fuss•es
v.intr.
1. To trouble or worry over trifles.
2. To be excessively careful or solicitous: fussed over their children.
3. To get into or be in a state of nervous or useless activity: fussed with the collar of his coat.
4. To object; complain. v.tr. To disturb or vex with unimportant matters.

I went to scripture to see what it says about fussing, and the NIV doesn’t use the word fuss. So searched in The Message (which I think tends to use more relatable words) and found several examples. First, I found that the word fuss was used by Jesus to describe Martha’s actions when he came to her home. You might remember the story: Martha is in the kitchen fussing while Mary is in living room sitting at the feet of Jesus—hanging onto his every word (Luke 10). In Matthew’s presentation of the Sermon on the Mount, we find a pretty clear teaching on the futility of fussing, too (see Matthew 6:24-28). It’s pretty clear in that teaching that fussing is not going to get us what we need, so why not use that energy more constructively?

I tried to do a search about “why” people fuss and all I found was what people fuss about (and a long list of how not to fuss about caring for babies—boy am I glad I’m past all that and can have all that energy for other things to fuss about). There are probably as many reasons that people fuss as there are people and situations to fuss in. One thing that seems to run consistently through each example and the definitions is that it is useless and majoring in the minors. So if we were to peel away all the uselessness, what might we find? I’m thinking we would find fear. That really hit home for me. I know how to look amazingly busy so that you won’t see and I won’t address my fear. Think about the Martha and Mary story. What was Martha’s fear? High on the list was the fear about what others would think. Was the house clean enough, was the meal good enough, was her dress pressed, and on and on. Bottom line: was she good enough for Jesus?

The answer for Martha and the answer for each of us is a resounding “yes!” The reality of that, the security, the ability to rest and trust comes through the development of the relationship. As I sat and pondered this I thought about my relationship with my mother. I treasure my mother, but our relationship has not always been the wonderful thing that it is today. More than anyone I know, my mother could send me into a flurry of fussing, of useless and nervous activity, quicker than anyone. If she was coming to visit, you could almost chronicle the stages of fussing. That has changed in the last few years. Oh, I’ll still rent my daughter to clean my house, but my fuss meter is much lower than I’d ever dreamed it could be. I may not be to the Mary end of things, but I’ve clearly moved away from Martha. How did that happen? Our relationship has changed. Certainly, she’s still my mother, but she is also my friend. She wants to see me doing well, but she doesn’t come into my house wearing white gloves and checking my under my bed for dust bunnies.

That same kind of relational development is what God wants with us too. I’m not suggesting a buddy-buddy familiarity with the Creator of the Universe who deserves our honor and awe, but I am advocating for a clearer understanding of our standing with him. Bad news: we’ll never be good enough to be in relationship with him on our own—save the energy of trying to make yourself look or be perfect. Good news: it’s all taken care of. He provided the means for restoring and growing relationship with him through his son. And not spending my energy, physically, emotionally, and spiritually on all that unnecessariness has freed me up to new levels of creativity and relationship. So I invite you, too. Step away from the fussing. Find balance. Yes, dinner will still need to be made. But make it from love, not from fear.

E: Expectations

What do you expect? Have you ever thought about that? What do you expect from your spouse or significant other? What do you expect from your children? Your friends? Your employer? The church? Your toothpaste? We have expectations of everyone and everything. I expect when I flip the switch that the lights are going to come on. I expect that if the label says new and improved the product is going to be better. I expect the police to protect me. I expect my alarm to go off when I set it. So, if I have expectations of everyone and everything, what are my expectations of God? What are yours?

When you signed onto this spiritual journey what did you expect from God? Here’s part of what he expected from you:
-"You shall have no other gods before me. Exodus 20:3
-He has showed you, O man, what is good. And what does the LORD require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God. Micah 6:8
-37Jesus replied: " 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.'[b] 38This is the first and greatest commandment. 39And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' Matthew 22:37-39

Jesus told a story to illustrate our expectations. It’s recorded in Matthew 20. There we find the story of the owner of the landowner who hirers laborers for the vineyard. The workers who worked the longest EXPECTED to get more pay. They just didn’t get the Landowners way of doing things…no more than we get God.

In the fifth Psalm we find these words of David: In the morning, O LORD, you hear my voice; in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait in expectation (vs. 3). We tell our friends that we will pray for them, but what do we expect God to do? Do we expect God to change the situation, to change them, to change us? How many times do we just toss our requests toward heaven and race out into the day, acting more like a over busy mate or a demanding teenager, never bothering to wait and hear from God?

Perhaps if we take some time to examine our expectations, we’ll find out where and perhaps why we’ve felt disappointed or distanced from God. And maybe he’ll show us how we’re doing with his expectations, too.

D: Drift

I was playing Scrabble the other day with a friend on line and found I had the letters to make the word kedge. The word is synonymous for anchor. Thinking about having and needing an anchor led me to think about drifting. What images come to mind when you think of drifting? For me, it’s lazy, mindless, floating away. And it’s not a bad image. Spiritually, it’s quite a different story.

There are many warnings in scripture to pay attention, to listen carefully, to stay focused to the end. The only place where we are warned against drifting is in Hebrews 2:1, “We must pay more careful attention, therefore, to what we have heard, so that we do not drift away.” A single reference might seem to diminish the importance, until you take into consideration that the entire book of Hebrews is like one huge warning to wake up and pay attention so that we don’t lose what’s most important.

God must have known how prone to wandering and drifting we would be. In the longest chapter of the longest book of the Bible, Pslam 119, we find some good words to help us with this problem. Actually, from that psalm we learn the keys to keeping our hearts anchored so that we can avoid drifting. There are so many, but here are just a few to get started with. Notice in verse ten that the Word can keep us from straying or wandering. When we are feeling weak, we can find renewed strength in the Word (vs. 28). When we feel confused, in the dark, the word becomes our light (vs. 130). Knowing this, is it any wonder that we are instructed to bind the Word to hearts, to tie them to our wrist, to wear them on our foreheads?

The hymn writer understood this bent to wandering, to drifting. In a statement of admission and a plea, we find these words: Prone to wander, Lord I feel it. Prone to leave the God I love. Here’s my heart, oh take and seal it. Seal it for thy courts above. Are you anchored or drifting? If you haven’t been paying attention, then listen up! It’s not too late to drop anchor!

B and C: Broken and Contrite

On my desk I have a toy (imagine that) figurine, Woody, from the Pixar Movie, Toy Story. His is sitting on a horse, tipping his hat. If you push on the base of the figurine, he collapses. He is a collapsible string toy. I looked it up on Google to make sure I had the name right. Asher and I were playing with the toy, and it occurred to me that many believers are just like that toy. They know how to “look” broken, but they really aren’t.

King David understood what it meant to be broken. There were no strings going to pop him back up into place. He had made a terrible mess of things, but he knew enough to go back to what he knew and Who he knew. He penned these words: The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise. (Psalm 51:17). Broken I think I get, but I can’t tell you the last time I used the word contrite in my every day conversation. I did a little reading up on this word, and if you look at its history you get a clear image of what God is looking for. Contrite literally means worn out, ground to pieces.

Okay, all those seeking to be pulverized step to the right please. What, no takers? I don’t know anyone who gets excited about the breaking process. It made me think of dirt…the kind you want to plant in. Remember the story Jesus told about the seeds and soil? The soil that was ready to receive the seed was the soil that was tilled, broken up. So what needs broken up, pulverized, ground to pieces in your life? What do you pretend in front of others to be broken over, but when they’re not looking you let the string go taunt and you pull it back together?

Understanding what God really wants from me definitely adds new meaning to “no strings attached.” It’s time to cut the strings and let the breaking begin.

A: Abounding

(I decided to finish out the month writing a thought, word picture, or nugget associated with a letter from the alphabet. We'll see how it goes.)

8And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work. (2 Corinthians 9:8, NIV)

I looked up the definition of abound, and found that it means to be filled, to be rich or well-supplied, and to occur in great quantities. I like having enough. Having more than I need isn’t bad, either. But right now, with money being stretched, extra isn’t really an option. We’ve had to pick and choose carefully where our dollars go. We used to tease Nelson about the way that he shopped. Mr. Bargain was great at finding a deal and stocking up. There for a while I never thought I was going to run out of toilet paper. We’re not seeing as much of that. He did find a good deal on sauerkraut last night, however.

In God’s economy, there’s one thing that we never have to worry about running out of: his grace. Couched in a section about giving, Paul tucks our verse for today. An offering was being collected and these folks gave beyond what was expected, and gave gladly. And I’ve got a hunch that when the dust settled and the preacher left town, these people found that they still had more than enough.

How is that? How could they still have enough? I believe that their enough and God’s grace are significantly linked. Too often we consider grace (and mercy) to be used like “Get out of jail free” cards, that God’s grace comes to mop up our messes, to get us through the tough times. It does in part, but not merely so that we can sit back until the next mess or trial and expect God to just get us through. God’s grace gives us everything we need so that we can be adequately prepared for the work he designed for us.

Tucked way back in the story of Abraham, God tells Abraham the secret to understanding how and why God blesses us. He tells Abe that he is blessed to be a blessing (Genesis 12:1-2). We are not meant to be reservoirs or storage centers for God to dump blessings in. As you marvel at your blessings today, ask God to show you how you can bless someone else. You have way more than enough to share!

Nothing Wasted

Have you ever pondered the question: “if you could go back in time and change any one decision, would you and which would it be? I used to get really irritated with those people who with seemingly no thought at all replied that there was no way. Were their lives so perfect that they had nothing to un-do? Some would respond negatively because they are who they are today because of the decisions they made. Great, but looking at your life from my perspective, sure leaves me wondering.

Then there’s me. I probably waste too much time wondering about what life might be like if I had done this instead of that. I would have a long list of potential changes, but I would be hard pressed to make a decision because I’d be afraid I’d make the wrong one yet again.

The fallout from one awful choice affects me in very obvious ways but also in ways no one can imagine. Our Sunday School class is planning a trip for next Fall to Canada. Nelson could go but he won’t. I can’t because Canada doesn’t allow felons to cross their borders. My High School class sent out an email regarding our 35th reunion. They’re considering booking a cruise. Hope they have a good time.

Now, before you think I’m just having too good a time at this little pity me party, please realize that I’ve come to accept these things as “is.” They are results of the poorest choices I’ve made in my life. But there is another side to consider. For me it is the philosophical and theological position that nothing is or should be wasted.

Right now I have a job that I wouldn’t have picked for myself. I spend five to six hours a day, three or four times a week, with an eighty-six year old woman who has Alzheimer’s. She doesn’t like having me hang out there, but it enables her family to keep her in the family home. At first I argued with God about the job. Talk about waste! Arguing with God? What was I thinking? When I finally quit arguing, I looked at the quiet hours completely differently: all that time to read, all that time to write, all that time to pray. My schedule is extremely flexible and I get to be home to watch my grandson.

My grandson. If I went back and undid that horrible decision, I wouldn’t have the pure joy this incredible child brings to my life every day. I would have grandchildren, but probably not the amazing three that I have because we would be living life differently and so would our girls and they would have had different decisions to make and on and on.

God knew all that. I don’t believe that God wanted me to make the decision that I made any more than he wanted or liked some of the decisions that David, Moses, Abraham, Paul, or Peter made. From the beginning God knew there would be heartache: his and ours because of choices. He could have created us, wired us, to always choose him, but he wanted us to want him so we had to be free to also choose to not want him. Even in that he demonstrates an immense love for us by showing us that he will take the mess we have made and reshape it into something useful and beautiful.

A few weekends ago, I shared my testimony, my story, at a retreat. I did this once before at the seminary where I got my counseling degree. It’s not that I enjoy getting vulnerable and opening the doors for people to hate me or be unkind to me. I tell my story to show the immeasurable grace and mercy of our Heavenly Father. I tell my story as a wakeup call to people who are dangerously close to making life decisions that could result in the ruination and loss of all they hold dear and sacred. I tell my story so that others who are surrounded the mess they made in their life by lousy, unhealthy, disastrous decisions can see that God can truly make beauty from ashes.

In the Gospels there is the story of Jesus feeding the multitudes with the lunch a boy had with him. Some say the greatest miracle was that the boy still had his lunch when Jesus needed it. Others say it was pretty miraculous the way Jesus and the disciples organized the massive crowd and got everybody fed in such short order. It’s all pretty amazing. The part that means the most to me was the way Jesus sent the disciples back and collected the leftovers, because nothing was to be wasted. That’s the way God works. That’s how he looks at life.

So I was sitting here just meditating on God as Redeemer and I got this image of God as the Great Recycler. Now, if we humans can figure out how to turn elephant poop into paper (http://www.elephantdungpaper.com/) and sell it for profit, don’t you think the Creator of the universe can figure out what to do with the mess you’ve made of your life?

Resting

Where I work I spend most of my time in two rooms, the kitchen and dining room. They are open to each other. In those two rooms there are four clocks. Should I venture into either bathroom there’s a clock there, too. I never have to wonder or worry about what time it is.

Time. When we think about it we wonder what time it is. We wonder if we’re late or early. How much time do we have? What do we do with our time? We’re accused of wasting time, marking time, stretching time, and watching time fly by.

I used to rush through my days. I was proud of how much I could cram into a day. More was always better and therefore, resulted in a better me. When I gave up sleep to focus on saving the world (or at least my little corner), I made some of the stupidest and most dangerous decisions, decisions that nearly cost me everything, including my life. I finally came to the conclusion that there is a reason that God rested and a reason that he commands it of us, as well.

This was the morning when we changed our clocks. It was time to “fall back.” While others were relishing an extra hour of sleep, I was awake and at my computer. I was reveling in the quiet. All I could hear was the rhythm of the clocks ticking around me. Now maybe if I only had that to listen to 24/7, it would become tortuous. Sitting there this morning, it was a Centering Symphony.

I was up “early” because someone imposed a time change on me. Isn’t that just how life seems to go? We grouse and complain because our time is not our own. Someone always seems to be demanding our time.

Recently, I was a t a retreat where the leaders took the watches and phones of the participants. The surrender was to free those attending from the tyranny of time. The thinking was/is to let the staff “worry” about time and schedule. Good as it was, the staff always had someplace for the participants to go or something for them to do, so there was no sense of “free time.”

Compare that to the experience of our house guest. We have a couple unoccupied rooms in our home, so we opened our space to a pastor friend who was between jobs with no place to stay. The first couple weeks she was with us, all she did was sleep, eat, and watch TV. Our interactions were minimal. Slowly, opportunities and necessities began to reenter her life and she began to go out with friends and go to some meetings. One day she came through the living room where I was reading. She sat and we chatted for a while. At the end of our talking, she shared how much she appreciated the opportunity to just be there with no expectations, just able to rest. It was the refreshing that she needed at every level of her being: heart, mind, soul, and strength.

In the great Shepherd Psalm (Psalm 23), we find so much of the care provided to and for us. One of the things we may overlook is that he who knows us and our needs makes us lie down. Thinking of this reminded me of my grandson. I can always tell when Asher needs a nap. Some days so can he. Don’t make the Shepherd bop you on the head with his crook to get you to rest. We were not created to go 24/7.

One day as Jesus was ministering, he looked out at the crowd and was moved to compassion when he saw how weary and out of synch they were. He offered them rest, to restore their rhythm. To receive this gift they needed to come to him and learn from him. Don’t you think it’s time to listen, to learn, to rest?